Anna had been walking for about half an hour. Despite the humid air and clouds of
mosquitoes, she was keeping her promise.
Every day that she could, she walked in the forest and renewed her
relationship with all the life there.
She sang to the river and made an offering of respect, of reciprocity. When she came to the Birch Toad, she made an
offering as well and placed her hand on the smooth birch bark. It was her touchstone, her place of
remembering and inspiration.
The mosquito-netted hat made it hard to look around. She tended to keep her eyes down on the trail
but even that was partially obscured by the black netting. It was like walking in the dusk even at
mid-day. Occasionally yellow, white or
purple asters that grew along the side of the trail caught her attention. She walked that trail so often that
sometimes, she stopped paying attention and listened to the dialogues in her
head, rehashing old conversations or planning new things. It was so easy to slip away in her mind,
especially after six decades of practice.
And so, when the black thing appeared on the trail ahead of
her, she felt a little startled. It was
not moving and as she got nearer, she could see the soft fur of a mole lying
outstretched on the trail, as if, half way across it had simply given up. There was no sign that it had been caught by
an animal and it actually looked asleep.
Anna knew that these hairy-tailed moles lived underground searching out
earthworms, slugs, grubs and insects but they would sometimes walk around on
the forest floor at night. Perhaps it’s
predator got scared off before it could consume the mole or perhaps an owl
dropped it and couldn’t find it again. In
the past, she had seen the raised earth of a mole’s tunnel crossing the trail
so she knew that moles lived in the forest.
But, it did seem unusual to find one lying right on the path.
Anna pondered this as she continued down the trail. Sweat was now running down her face and into
her eyes. She rubbed them through the
net and then burrowed her hands into her pockets to keep them away from the
insects that were intent on injesting her blood. Her walking stick was clasped under her right
armpit so that her hand could be safely hidden.
She would need the stick on the steep hills.
Suddenly, her foot rolled on a thick branch and she
stumbled. Catching her balance, she
managed to stay upright although her heart was beating faster. How peculiar.
She had walked this trail so many times and had never had a stick roll
beneath her foot. She would have to be
more careful and look out for branches.
But this was a forest, and there were roots and branches everywhere so
she soon gave up looking. Her mind kept
drifting into the past as sadness welled up.
She thought of people that she missed and her old home. Her tears mixed with the sweat on her face
but it didn’t seem to matter beneath the netting, here in the forest. This was her safe place where she could let
down the masks that were required around people. Some of the water from her wet face condensed
on her glasses causing them to steam up.
This made it even harder to see, but she kept walking nevertheless.
When she got to the Birch Toad and made her offering, she
placed her hand on the smooth birch bark of the remaining trunk.
“Stay,” she heard.
“Stay.”
“I can’t. The
mosquitoes are too much and I am so hot.
I can’t stay,” she said quietly.
“Stay. We have
something to show you.”
“Can you show me as I walk?” she bargained.
But there was silence.
Deep inside of her, Anna felt the desire to stay, but the sweat and the
bugs made her too uncomfortable and she decided to keep going. Suddenly, her
right toe caught on a tree root and she stumbled forward. She got her left hand out of her pocket and
used it to brace herself but her right hand was stuck and she landed on the
sandy ground. Her left arm, chest and
right knee took the impact, sparing her face.
Feeling shaky, Anna got onto her hands and knees, stood up and brushed
the sand from her jeans and light jacket.
Anna had a good history of falling but she had never fallen in this
forest before. It felt like something
was really trying to get her attention.
Once again, Anna’s tears ran with the sweat down her face
and neck. She sniffed loudly and began
to cry. Her chest hurt where she had landed
as did her right knee. Then she
remembered that there were lots of people who felt sad and uncomfortable and
she breathed in the feeling. The
emotional pain was in her heart area and in her belly. As she breathed out, she thought about
sending relief to herself and everyone else who was suffering. She imagined relief as the feeling of a cool
breeze on her face. This ancient
breathing technique allowed her to open to her own feelings while connecting
her with everyone else who felt that way.
She surrendered to the feelings and kept up the practice for a few
minutes. The feelings dissolved and her
head cleared. She was breathing down to
her belly and she gradually became aware of her feet. While walking, her attention had been up in
her head so that she ignored any information that her feet were picking up.
“No wonder I fell,” she thought. As she drew her attention down into her feet,
she became aware of all the sensations that they were sharing with her. She could feel the soft, sandy soil give way
to her weight. She could feel small
twigs and stones even through her shoes.
She thought about how moles travel underground with no sight and little
hearing. They are guided by their sense
of smell and heightened sense of touch.
They can travel fifteen feet in one hour as they expertly burrow through
the forest floor. She had lost her sense
of sight inside the humid netted hat and she had ignored her sense of touch.
Anna’s awareness dropped beneath her feet and she could imagine
the complicated tunnels that the moles carved out in their quest for food. She imagined moles navigating around tree
roots and stones. In her mind’s eye she
saw the mole digging straight up to create an air hole by pushing the soil
straight up and out. She could feel that
air flooding the tunnels and aerating the forest floor. That made her take a deep breath and she
noticed that her chest no longer hurt.
Behind her closed eyes, she saw the mole descend again,
tunneling deeper and deeper. She could
feel the soil get cooler and moister until the mole came to the water
table. The pure water that had been
filtered by the sand felt alive to her senses even in the dark. She became aware of the tree roots that had
grown into the aquifer, drawing the water upwards towards their trunks by some
mysterious means.
The mole was on the move again, this time in an upwards
direction, The tunnel opened up through
rootlets and fungal networks that were the internet of the forest floor. These mycorrhizal networks allowed the trees
to communicate and to share resources.
She could feel the excited energy of these interchanges on the surface
of her skin. It was like a busy mall at
Christmas time.
Every now and then, the mole stopped to eat. Anna became aware of the invertebrate life in
the forest floor. Earthworms,
centipedes, millipedes, beetles, slugs, grubs and hundreds of other creatures
that were strange and wonderful were revealed as the mole burrowed on. Anna was entranced by this journey under the
surface led by her expert guide mole.
But, eventually, it dug through the soil of the trail and popped up on
the surface.
She opened her eyes and was surprised to notice that there
was no buzzing. The mosquitoes had
disappeared. She breathed in all the
smells of the forest in one deep breath.
She took the breath all the way to her feet and realized that she could
feel every part of herself at once. Her
skin tingled and her fingers felt electric.
She had stayed despite her own protestations, despite her
own discomfort. She had stayed and gone
beneath the surface. Somehow mole had
helped her listen to her heart, not her complaining brain. And the forest had shown her the normally
“invisible” part of its community. In
trusting only what she could see with her eyes, Anna had missed so much of the
magic. The trees looked like individuals
on top of the surface while underneath, they were intricately
interconnected. Just like people who
look like unique beings are interconnected by genetics, society and
consciousness. There was so much more
there than appeared to the eye.
It was time to move on and Anna started to walk again. The hundreds of mosquitoes who were sitting
on her hat rose in a minute flock and began to circle her head. She laughed at her companions and said “Come
on, let’s go.” Within a few steps, her
right heel rolled on a small stick but this time, she was not thrown off
balance. She could feel her feet and the
messages they sent. She knew she was
walking over roots and living beings and tunnels of air and moles so she
stepped lightly, grateful to be in their presence, grateful to share Earth with
them.
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